Relationship Quote: I think that some people forget that friendships and relationships are not a service that someone provides, it’s a two way street where both give and get. – Ignoble Savage
What are the classic symptoms that reveal your relationship has reached the end?
Especially if you’ve been an item for a lengthy period, it can be difficult to reach the mutual conclusion that the time has come for you to go your separate ways. Prolonging this moment can only exacerbate any negative factors that have driven a wedge through your relationship. The longer this goes on, the greater the risk of any lingering positives breaking down into full-blown acrimony. It is always far better to be open about your issues. In order to do that, you must be able to recognize the tell-tale symptoms that indicate you’ve passed the point where your relationship can be salvaged.
A healthy relationship is defined by the two parties having mutual respect. While you might fall out from time to time and disagree on a lot of subjects, at the end of the day they will always be prepared to compromise and satisfy your partner’s aspirations as best you can. This positive attitude can break down. If you feel nothing but contempt for one another this indicates your relationship is approaching the end of its tether. Negative emotions can be very difficult to reconcile. Even if you manage to retrieve the situation, it can degenerate again all-too-easily.
We have all heard the description about someone being needlessly argumentative: they are the type of person who would argue that black is white. While this behaviour might be admirable in political debates, in a relationship it is far less healthy. If you find that your partner is constantly bickering with you and seeking arguments where they would have previously allowed banter to control your conversations, this is another classic symptom that, for whatever reason, they are less than content.
In an ideal world, relationships would always glide along on an even keel, partners lovingly gazing into one another’s eyes without noticing the gorgeous waiter/waitress flirting every time they bring a new dish to the table. But the human condition is far more complex than that. Regardless of how happy we might be in a relationship, infidelity is liable to rear its ugly head from time to time. Some people will be able to resist temptation; others will not.
There may be situations where one party has strayed and become involved with someone outside of the relationship. If this has been a one-off, then it is up to the spurned partner to decide whether or not they are willing to forgive and forget; although once trust has gone this can be a big ask. In some partnerships as soon as the guilty person has been admonished they may well find it more difficult to resist the urge to be unfaithful whenever this situation arises in future. Serial infidelity, the usage of a dating service or any other activity like this one is a clear indication that a relationship has already struck the rocks and it is merely waiting for the victim to finally pronounce its demise.
The only secrets that should exist in any relationship are the ones concerning surprise birthday gifts or Christmas presents. When it comes to masking emotions this is something altogether more detrimental. If your partner is always telling lies about places they are going to or have been, then there is clearly a reason for them behaving in this way. You need to ask yourself the basic questions. Why are they not being truthful about their activities? Who are they actually with when you are not around?
It can be very tough to try to get to the bottom of all this when they are weaving an elaborate web of deceit. Also, for all that this individual might seem to have lost their integrity, there will still be part of you that is reluctant to stoop to their level. Would you really go as far as checking up on them, either by snooping through online communication, or in extreme cases, actually following them?
The key word here is trust. As soon as this has been prized out of the core of any relationship, then this is a classic symptom that the time has come to call it a day. There may well be plausible explanations for an errant partner’s behavior but in the majority of cases where secrecy is prevailing there will be clear reasons why the other party has strived to create this situation.
Another obvious symptom is incompatibility when it comes to physical intimacy. In a healthy relationship, levels of desire are often in-sync. This is a situation that occurs naturally and spontaneously. But when one individual finds their advances are continually being rejected for whatever reason, this can lead to extreme resentment. And the underlying question has to be what exactly has created this sudden barrier? Again, this could well be symptomatic that your relationship has reached its expiry date.