I Think That Some People Forget That Friendships

“I think that some people forget that friendships and relationships are not a service that someone provides, it’s a two way street where both give and get.” – Ignoble Savage

Now, what does that really mean for you and me? Let’s break it down in a way that makes sense, because this idea can seriously change how you see the people in your life.

Think about a service you use, like getting your car washed or ordering food. You pay someone, and they do something for you. It’s a one-way thing, right? You’re the customer, they’re providing the service.

But friendships and relationships? They’re totally different. They aren’t like ordering a pizza where you just expect it to show up. They’re more like a garden. If you want beautiful flowers to bloom, you can’t just sit back and watch. You need to plant seeds, water them, give them sunlight, and maybe even pull out some weeds. The garden gives back beauty and maybe even some delicious veggies, but only if you put in the effort.

That’s what it’s all about. Your friends, your family, your romantic partners – they aren’t there just to serve you. They’re not vending machines where you put in your needs and expect them to pop out happiness, support, or attention.

It’s a “two-way street.” Imagine a road with cars going in both directions. For things to flow smoothly, everyone needs to participate. You can’t just drive your car down the middle expecting everyone else to get out of your way. You need to give way, follow the rules, and be mindful of the other drivers.

In your relationships, this means:

• It’s not just about what you need. It’s also about what the other person needs. Do they need a listening ear? Do they need help with something? Do they just need to know you’re thinking of them?
• You have to put in effort. Just like watering a plant, you need to invest time and energy into your relationships. This could be as simple as sending a text, making a phone call, or just being present when you’re together.
• You have to be willing to give. Sometimes, you’ll be the one offering support, advice, or a helping hand. Other times, you’ll be the one receiving it. That’s the natural give and take of a healthy connection.
• It’s not always 50/50 at every moment. Life happens. Sometimes one person might need more support than the other. But over time, the effort and care should feel relatively balanced. If it consistently feels like you’re the only one putting in the work, that’s a sign something might be off.

Think about your own friendships and relationships. Are they feeling like a two-way street? Are you both giving and getting? Or does it sometimes feel like you’re the only one doing the driving?

This isn’t about keeping score, but it is about recognizing that healthy connections thrive on mutual effort and care. When both people are invested in the relationship, it becomes stronger, more fulfilling, and a real source of joy and support in your life.

So, take a moment to reflect. How can you be a better participant on the “two-way street” of your important relationships? What can you give today to nurture those connections? It might be a small gesture, but it can make a world of difference.

Keep growing, keep connecting, and remember – healthy relationships are built together.